Apparently you make a good broom.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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