dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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