babies were throwing up all over the place
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
