Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize