he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
