yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
