tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
