im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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