I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
