...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
