Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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