i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
