you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
