so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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