It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
We don't watch enough power rangers
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?