is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
