I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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