Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
