idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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