I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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