bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize