ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize