Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
