Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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