I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Randomize
