is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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