The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
we should paint friendship bongs
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
