I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize