just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
