Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
