perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
