i don't like sucking hair
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
