the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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