i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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