i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
