make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Terrible idea I love it
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
