So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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