Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize