i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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