So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
