covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
