Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Bring me that man meat
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Randomize
