he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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