I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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