I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
