left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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