If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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