i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Still dying that you shit outside
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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