it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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