its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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