I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
operation have a gay friend backfired
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
