No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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